More bullet points from our first intense week of transition:
- Waking up to temperatures in the 50’s inside our apartment. Eating breakfast together in our winter coats and hats.
- Existential questions left and right from my ever-inquisitve 8-year-old. More deep and serious discussions this week than I can remember – how our family is different and “weird”, what bothers him about me, gender roles, worldwide crises, views on material possessions, and so much more.
- Lilia blazing through a workbook her teacher gave her for homeschooling this spring. She may have learned to read this weekend…
- Waking to Jedidiah throwing up on the floor beside my bed.
- Walls in my spirit torn down – able to accept it all as a gift – the hardships, the changes in plans – and to be thankful for the new path that emerges.
- A harp-regulation twenty years overdue.
- Feeling thankful for the help I didn’t know how to ask for – laundry done by some one I hardly know, a friend with a husband away too who can commiserate in the hard moments, more boxes piled outside my door when I’m running low.
- A back door that is still boarded up as the projected three-week porch project turns into over three months. The porch will be beautiful, I say out of obligation, knowing we may never use it. In these hard days, it is a small thing that makes my days harder – walking out the front door and around the building to take out trash & recycling and to get to the basement laundry machines.
- Thankful for health regained quickly for Jedidiah, even allowing us to go to church this morning.
- Lilia’s shining smile as she works on projects – her notebook from school, a menu of items she will make me on my birthday: “Don’t get up on your birthday, mommy. Just stay in bed, and I’ll bring you breakfast.” For days, she said, “How will I get you a present? I’m going to have to find some one to walk me to Quake Collectibles (a second-hand collectibles shop that sells toys, where she can by Beanie Babies for a dollar).” Then, on Friday she used the points she had earned at school to by me a present from the “point store.” She wrapped the little pink ball with a star on it and presented it to me proudly after school. I am floored by her giving heart.
- Simeon kissing his stuffed animals goodnight.
- Chapped faces, hands, and lips in the dryness of winter.
- Humidifier running day and night.
- Repositioning Simeon throughout the night to help him breathe better in the dry air with a stuffy nose, praying it is not a more serious issue than that causing his little snores.
- A giant packet of artwork for me to ooh and ahh and generally gush over – sent home by the art teacher for both kids – all their work from the year so far.
- Trying to keep things seeming clean and home-y as the piles of boxes grow each day.
- Simeon asking for us to sing O Come O Come Emanuel like we did during advent – raising his little arm and singing “Rejoice!” like we do for the church candle dance.
There is newfallen snow tonight – beautiful, yet bringing much work for the morning. Your prayers are holding me up. This has been a trying time, but I feel distinctly prayed for.